A scholarly scrap between St Patrick's Grammar School teachers past and present broke out at County Armagh Golf Club on Saturday 17 June, as Paddy Loughran narrowly edged out Gerry Cullen to earn victory in the club stableford competition.
Paddy, Club Captain in 1996, started steadily if unspectacularly as he was five over par and level his handicap for the first five holes.
However, a par at the 6th followed by a birdie two at the Quarry got the retired maths man motoring and he would reach the turn with a superb 21 points.
Loughran's back-nine performance was almost as brilliant as he bashed home pars at the 11th, 12th, 14th and, most impressively, the 17th and 18th on his way to a 20-point homeward haul.
Paddy's fine 41-point total clipped his handicap to 16 and granted him a much deserved success that proves there's still plenty of competitive spirit left in this veteran campaigner.
County Armagh Golf Club's toughest hole: the 16th, Lakes.
The runner-up berth was filled by Loughran's former colleague and soon-to-be fellow retiree, Gerry Cullen, who posted the same excellent score but lost out on a break of tie owing to his inferior back nine.
Cullen played solidly for the vast majority of his round, never more so than when reeling off five pars in a row between the 4th and 8th.
With an irresistible 24 points in the bank at the halfway stage, Gerry's hitherto scintillating progress was checked slightly with a no-score at the 10th, but the economics guru bounced back admirably in chalking up further pars at the 11th, 14th and 15th before a 6, 5, 6 finish.
That disappointing climax may leave Cullen feeling that he left a few shots out there but, nonetheless, this was an outstanding outing that conferred on him 18-handicapper status.
Refusing to be completely overshadowed by his father's tournament-winning antics was Mark Loughran, who took the category 1 plaudits with 40 points.
Mark's fabulous gross 71 contained birdies at the 6th, 12th, 14th and 17th as he completed the back nine in just 34 strokes.
That fact was crucial in Mark's finishing ahead of Stephen Catterall. He, too, yielded 40 points from a neat-and-tidy day's work of 11 pars and seven bogeys.
The summit of the category 2 standings also showed two players neck and neck on 40 points.
Flame-haired James Thompson nabbed the honours here, largely on account of a terrific closing streak of five consecutive pars that helped him to both become a 12-handicapper and push Bernard Grimley into second position.
Bernard, he of the prolific prizewinning Grimley tribe, now plays off 13 after registering a birdie at the 3rd and eight pars elsewhere.
Dermot Haughey triumphed in category 3 after signing a classy 39-point scorecard that boasted four pars and a birdie at the 7th.
Next to Dermot was big Philip Richards, who also notched four pars but was somewhat undermined by par 5 struggles before he eventually declared on a highly creditable 38-point total.
The peerless Philip Kelly sealed the gross honours with a magnificent three-under-par 67 in which he bogeyed the 4th, birdied the 9th, 12th, 13th and 18th and parred everything else. It's a simple game really.